Join the dots

What would happen if, in every situation, you expressed how you felt?

Your opinion of your friends clothes/haircut may immediately reduce their Christmas card list!

You political views would no longer be a private matter.

The energy companies may well have another phone call to deal with.

And so on.

What if you expressed how you felt about life to those who are the very closest to you? Those you share your life with, whether they are family members or close friends? Most of us do significant self editing before we express our feelings to others, especially about the deepest things going on in our lives. We drop subtle hints via our body language, our occasional comment or moment of silence. Those around us take these dots, join them together, fill in the gaps and come up with a picture of what is going on. Sometimes they are right, frequently they are not quite.

What if, during our self editing, we just let a little more through? We may discover our friends are much more supportive and understanding than we initially thought.

What if we really spoke to God about how we are feeling? Instead of 'blessing' prayers or 'if it's your will' prayers why not speak to God about how you feel rather than what you want him to do? He is the greatest friend after all.

We all might find that God provides for us in a way we never imagined when we speak to him in a way we never anticipated.

Failing and Sailing

Yesterday was a bit if a disaster in terms of completing the task of volunteering to meet a local need. I went to my local row of shops and the local church to see if there was something in a window or on the notice board that I could volunteer for.

Fail. 

I couldn't find one thing that I could step up to the mark for - but I'll keep trying as today I need to go to Kirkintilloch, our nearest small town (we prefer small towns to cities), and I'll have a look there.

Today's task is something else altogether: create something, make something for a friend I haven't seen for a long time. Sail!

I love making things! Those of you who have followed this blog for a little while will know I am an occasional soap maker, fairly bad woodworker, I attempt writing occasionally and will give pretty much anything a go when it comes to craft working. It should be plain sailing.

What if they don't like it? What if they think it's just a pile of junk? What if I offend one friend by making something for another friend?

I used to spend a lot of time 'overthinking' - I have learned that all I am doing is taking credit from the 'bank of tomorrow' when I do that. This really is a task where the thought is what counts - I'm so confident that my friend will appreciate the gift that it almost won't matter if they don't keep it, or if another friend would like something as well.

I love my friends - I don't have many and each is worth the world to me.

Momentous Achievement

Well today was a spectacular day for me personally. It was the day that I received an e mail from Cliff College to tell me that my MA dissertation has been passed by the internal examiners. It has caused me to explore many things about my calling and about my relationships with others not least of all my friends - 'friendship and faith' being the subject of the dissertation.

Mission has been at the heart of this thinking. If I am not sharing faith with friends I am failing in my mission. If I have no friends who are as yet unsaved do I have a mission - I can't make friends as 'projects' to win and then be left to fend for themselves. Although that appears to be what many people do in the church (you'll need to read the full text to really get a grip on that one!!)

Through formal studies I have a renewed spirit myself and a renewed heart for mission and reaching out to the lost - some of whom are within the church.

So the family are now saying 'go on you've got to do the Doctorate' but I really can't see myself in a surgery saying 'take two paracetamol daily and your evangelism will be better within the month'

Oh well...

I never said it would be easy. I was warned by others. My expectations were raised then dashed without a care for my own feelings. What am I on about?... blogging of course!

I see so many people I know that blog away to their hearts content exercising a diligence in getting their thoughts onto the page with fluid expressions of feeling and astute and often witty comment (Gordon Cotterill on Boots '08 particularly so!) and yet I have had numerous false starts. This might be another one but hey - I guess I'm probably in the majority if that does turn out to be the case!!

I got into facebook in a real and meaningful way - met up with some people I haven't seen for years - fantastic! (I just have to stop joining groups that I don't really want to be in now) so why has blogging been so difficult for me? Maybe I'm just trying to be too clever when really I'm just a simple individual.

Anyway I'll keep trying...watch this space (although nothingmay occur!)